Now That The Love Days Gone

Why do you love who love?
Valentines day has officially come and gone,
 pretty soon the chocolate will go on clearance,
& only the sweet memories of sending love letters to my friends & family will linger.
As will the adventures I had with Greg yesterday;

my Quality Time Gift to him;

a trail of m&m's that led to 14 QualityTime coupons 

with me at the end asking" Will you Beer My Valentine?".

Yummy Wawa breakfrast wraps on our way to

Watching Moses at Sights & Sounds;His Surprise + Musical + Bible + Free  gift to me

Jamming to Valentines Mix 2014.

Troeg's Brewery for Testing & Lunch.

Cultivator,Chocalate Stout,Nugget Nectar for him & Chocolate Stout, Troegenator,& Perpetual IPA for me

An unexpectedly delicious duck confit smoked grapes & white beans for lunch prepared by Troeg's Kitchen.

our favorite by far was their scratch beer #172 CHOCOLATE STOUT;

a quick pitstop to Chocolate World

 flurryfilled stroll through downtown Harrisburg & across a lighted bridge

Starbucks Frappucino's for dessert as we window shopped.

the Jersey Girl in me just couldn't resist trying on this beauti-fur coat on, maybe I'll be back for you.

It's a holiday that like it or not, when enjoyed properly, celebrates a beautiful thing.
Obviously humanity yearns to love and be loved. 
Thousands of articles are written regarding this day, which is all well and good,
but I'd like to write about love itself.

The more I live, experiencing different people with different life experiences,
I've stumbled across this thought:
Why do we love who we love?
Now that valentines is over, and we get back to loving everyone all day, everyday
we can set aside some time to let that question linger;
Why do we love who we love?

It is my belief that if you " love" someone based on how they make you feel
or their attributes or the good they've done
...you don't really love them.

Love, true love, should be just because,
unconditional & unmerited.
Because they are a human being

Someones kind& giving heart shouldn't be the premise of you loving them.
Because then when they act unkindly or selfishly,
does your love for them stop?
 Is your love for them diminished?

What I am getting at is this, when I ask Greg why he loves me,
he says ; I love you because I love you.
which annoyed me at first, but there is no " why"
there is no condition.
There is no rhyme or reason he just does.

Of course he loves my kind heart,mylaughter, jovial personality etc.
yes he loves who I am, but who I am is not WHY he loves me.
 (which obviously remind me of How God loves us)

This is why we should love others
not because they make us feel good,supported,or wanted.
Love is not self seeking,
& too often love is misunderstood as something quantifiable,as if it could be earned.

We should love who we love because they are.

Now I am attempting to write very tactfully so what I am saying is understood clearly.
I am by no means condoning loving the harmful actions people make,
I am supporting loving the person still.
Knowing full well that sometimes how people need to be loved,
 means laying down the law & not tolerating poor actions.

I feel there is a huge disconnect somewhere along the way regarding " why we love who we love" ,
everybody jumps into love eager for the adrenaline rush that it can be.
It is euphoric to be loved;by mother, sister, friend, co-worker, husband etc.

But we must know full well when we love who we love, it's not about what they can do for us,
but what we can do for them,
because we want to make their lives better in any way possible.

Otherwise we've got it all wrong & we're not really loving others, we're just loving the attention they give us.

I am writing this partially out of response to Valentines day,
but mainly to address something that breaks my heart;
the notion that we need to fit some type of mold in order to be loved
 and straying out of that in any way shape or form takes love away.

So as valentines day has come and passed away I challenge you think about those who have loved you best;
is it not those who have seen your ugly & beautiful;
yet there love for you has remained constant.
Unconditional love.
Not based on how many golden stars,
but just because you are human
and all human beings are radically loved by a magnificent God.
And if he could love me relentlessly & unconditionally ,
who am I to love others in any way other than this?